Life is a hero’s journey, not a drama triangle.
Our lives are filled with ups and downs. Challenges arise, conflicts emerge with others, and sometimes we fall into victimhood stories. It’s easy to get trapped in what’s called the “drama triangle” – bouncing between the roles of victim, villain, and hero in an endless cycle.
But we can break this pattern. Rather than reacting to life’s dramas, we can take charge of our own heroic journey.
The drama triangle often plays out like this: something bad happens, and we feel like victims. We blame others or the world for our misfortune. We might even lash out and make someone else the villain. Eventually, we try to “heroically” resolve the conflict and gain redemption.
But the resolution is temporary. Before long, the drama cycle begins again as we struggle against new villains and obstacles. We never escape the triangular dynamic of fighting monsters we perceive outside ourselves.
Life doesn’t have to be this endless reactionary loop. What if we stepped back and saw life as our hero’s journey, not someone else’s drama?
Heroes in myths and movies like Luke Skywalker or Harry Potter follow a different path. They get called to adventure, cross thresholds, face trials, clash with enemies, receive mentoring, and emerge transformed. The journey is inward, not just outward.
We are the heroes of our lives. Will we accept the call to adventure? Our trials may come from within as much as from external forces. Blaming situations just traps us in the drama triangle. But taking responsibility puts us on the hero’s path.
Mentors can help, like Dumbledore guiding Harry. But ultimately, we must mentor ourselves, finding inner wisdom when we feel most lost. As heroes, we keep moving forward. Our transformation comes when we stop fighting villains and instead understand how all of life initiates us.
We will falter at times. The drama triangle lurks, tempting us with victimhood and righteousness. But we can step back and remember that life is our adventure tale. Every chapter prepares us for rebirth.
Until our death, our choice on this earth is to live as heroes. The journey may be hard, but embracing it is the only way we can become who we’re meant to be. Our life is what we make of it.
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Photo by Chris Yang on Unsplash